Why are you lonely when you’re not alone? It might just be emptiness

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There tends to be a common misconception that loneliness comes solely from feeling alone. But what if you don’t have any real reason to be lonely? That is when the question arises- what if you feel lonely when you’re not alone, and you really shouldn’t be?


Ironically, the fact is that in order to feel lonely, one does not have to be alone. 


Loneliness can come from a variety of sources. It can be from a lack of company of people who understand you, or a lack of someone you can call a partner, and it can even just simply be a lack of people in general.


Yet sometimes, loneliness can arise in a situation where you have people, you have a person or persons who understand you, and even the ideal partner. 


Where does such loneliness come from? And what can be done about such loneliness?


Loneliness can, in fact, be confused with a feeling of emptiness. When you feel that something is missing, or that there is an emptiness inside- it can feel like you are alone- even when you very truly aren’t. 

Such emptiness can come from a new situation, leaving things behind, starting a new life, making big changes, losing something (even if it isn’t a person!) that meant something to you. 

And sometimes, even if you come to terms with the fact that you are indeed not lonely but feeling empty from a change or something being missing, that emptiness doesn’t immediately go away. 



  • What can you do about it?

There are many things you can do to tackle this emptiness-loneliness derivative. Though there is never only one source, there are many remedies and habits to create that tackle the direct causes of the way you feel. 

Whether you know why you feel the way you do or not, trying different remedies can help start the process of elimination to reach the root of the issue- or better yet, provide you with so much wholesome activity and satisfaction that the loneliness ceases to exist. 



  • Read a book

Escaping to a different world- whether fantasy or realistic- can prove to be one of the most therapeutic and consoling activities. 

When you feel lonely or empty, reading a book and immersing yourself in a new world can provide a new sense of belonging- new surroundings to learn, characters to get to know, and a whole world to understand. Some of the best types of company is a good book- where loneliness can be forgotten, even if just for just a short while. 

Better yet, if there is a book in a part of a series, you can grow to learn and love the characters and the world they reside in and feel as if they are your long-lost friends. Though fiction, the characters in a story, the words on a page can provide great company when needed!



  • Go for a walk

Another huge causal factor in loneliness and feelings of emptiness is the new lifestyle of being closed in the house- a constant cycle of work and routines and technology. People before technology really kicked in were happier for a reason- they were in the natural environment, where people are meant to be surrounded by. 

And while going for a walk is great exercise, the hidden benefits of being soaked in the sun’s natural vitamin D and smelling the green and seeing the clear blue sky, there is no better therapy and company to give the mind and heart solace. 

Even in loneliness, going for a walk can bring more optimistic, clear-minded thoughts that bring you back on track and rethink your situations and simply refresh. 



  • Catch up with people you haven’t spoken to in a while- or someone new

If the people currently in your life don’t seem to be filling in a certain void that needs filling, reconnecting with people you once were close to and lost touch with- or never got the chance to know better, can open new doors. 

A rekindled friendship or a new one is oftentimes the best way to fill an emptiness. The perspectives that one person may provide, others probably never can. 

And the company that a new person may give you, may fill holes that others never have. 



  • Start a passion project

The emptiness that stems from feeling lonely also comes from a lack of purpose. When you do not have a set routine or are working in a set routine that does not speak to your heart or soul, then that is when you know that your emptiness is a lack of purpose. 

When you have a lack of purpose, you don’t know what to do or why to do it- motivation and passion disappears. Simply exploring new passions if you don’t know what yours is- or pursuing passions you may have been neglecting can take away the feelings of emptiness when you don’t feel your heart and soul in what you do. 

Whatever you do, do it with your heart. Passion is a fire that keeps you going, that pushes you from one task to the next, one day to the next, and keeps you full inside with motivation not only to continue onwards but to enjoy yourself and feel satisfied while you’re at it!


  • Exercise!

All psychological benefits aside, countless scientific studies prove that regular, proper exercise releases critical hormones that contribute to feelings of satisfaction, happiness, and fullness. 

Sometimes emptiness is from lack of feeling and movement, and with both the physical and mental health benefits that come along proper exercise can take your mind off of feelings that shouldn’t be there in the first place. 


  • Count your blessings

No matter the loneliness and emptiness you may feel, there will always be blessings that you can be thankful for. Whether it is the air you breathe or the food you eat, or even the fact that you are alive- there is so much you have that millions of people around the world do not. 

Of course, this is not to say that your struggle doesn’t matter. Just because there are people in the world who have “worse” struggles by typical definition, doesn’t mean that what you feel is not valid or worthy of attention. 

Counting your blessings, nevertheless, can help shed light on things that can make you happy and thankful, and thankfulness is a surefire way to be rid of some loneliness- which in the end really truly is emptiness. The benefits of thankfulness  truly are limitless. 



  • You know yourself!

In the end, every person is the best judge of the state of their own mind, heart, and soul. No matter the detail a friend or family member knows, no matter the detail you may tell a therapist, sometimes just introspection can help you to find the root cause- and if not, come face to face with your inner demons and fill that emptiness with something new and satisfying!

The world is full of new opportunities, places, people, and experiences. With all the options out there, the possibilities of filling that void are endless. 

I have provided you with the potential inspiration you need. 


All you need now, is the motivation to go out there and try.




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